The Greatest Mindy Kaling Quotes To Get You Pumped For Season Three Of ‘The Mindy Project’

The Mindy Project returns on Sept. 16 and you know what that means ... more Mindy. Not only is Mindy Kaling the executive producer on the show, but she also plays Mindy Lahiri on the FOX comedy. We love this show so much that we had to round up the best quotes from Mindy to get you ready for season three of the amazing romantic comedy.

On human rights:

"I have the right to life, liberty and chicken wings."

On self motivation:

"You're not Mindy, you're a warrior, and your warrior name is... Beyoncé Pad Thai."

On saying "no:"

"I am not good at saying no, okay? One time I left a flea market with a samurai sword."

On body image:

"I am not overweight, I fluctuate between chubby and curvy."

On being a mess:

On death:

"Did you know that when I die, in my will I leave all of my money to Tina Fey? I don't even know her! I just think she would spend it in interesting and responsible ways."

On ratting people out:

"Tattling is when a little girl does it. When a hot woman does it, it's called whistle-blowing."

On online dating:

"If you're a serial killer I'm not interested. If you're a serial killer who only murders serial killers I'm very interested."

On boring dates:

"I'm sorry. I'm just texting so we don't have to make conversation."

On her weight:

On getting married:

"My plan was to marry rich, and then stop working. Or to marry old and then, when the guy died, inherit all his money. But old guys think I have sass-mouth."

On hot, but stupid guys:

"My body is very attracted to your body but when you speak, my brain gets angry."

On love:

"Danny, if we're still single in five years and we haven't found anybody can we make a pact? That we will kill each other?"

 On overeating:

"Guy, over the holiday I had five hams and a goose like I am a wolf in a children's story."

And just for fun.... Mindy being amazing, channeling the one and only Sandra Bullock:

Lead photo: The Mindy Project/Facebook